Happy New Year!

As this year comes to a close I find myself not saying that i'm glad this year is over, as many others that I know have been saying. I feel lucky because 2011 was a good year for me. I had a lot of good times and memories and really got to enjoy life. As I say goodbye to this year I can only hope that 2012 will be as equally awesome. I keep my fingers crossed that no bad luck will come my way. And if it does i'll bitch slap it until it scurries away crying. I have no New Year's Resolutions, other than to continue being happy, continue learning, continuing being open to new experiences, and continue enjoying the good moments and be thankful for what I have. The end of the year also has me saying goodbye to the 30's. I still find it hard to believe that i'm going to be 40 years old. The 30's were for the most part a good decade for me. I learned a lot but most importantly I learned how to be happy person and enjoy what life has to offer. However much longer I have on this planet I plan on making the best of it.

 

May 2012 be filled with more fun, more joy, more tattoos, and more hot men.

Cute Toys

I recently picked up some cute toys at my local Japanese store Kinokuniya. One was a little green Android figure. Since I got me an Android phone I figured this toy would be a good addition to my collection. It's basically a cute little green robot.

The others are Tokidoki Unicorns. They come in unmarked boxes so you never know which one you'll get. There were 2 in particular that I wanted, a black one with red eyes named Fumo and a light blue one with a mowhawk named Pogo. I ended up with Pogo but haven't gotten Fumo yet. I also got some other ones that are way cute. Their names are:

Top from left to right: Stellina and Bellina. Bottom row from left to right: Dolce, Pogo, Ritmo and Mooka. Tokidoki makes cute toys and figures, as well as clothes and make-up. The little skull & crossbones heart design on Pogo's butt is the same design I have tattooed on my right arm.

My favorite films of 2011

Now keep in mind that I didn't watch every film released in 2011, and there's some that I want to watch but haven't gotten around to watching yet (the remake of Girl With The Dragon Tattoo for instance). These are just my favorites of the ones that I did see.

 

Kaboom! = Greg Araki's latest film is a return to the earlier outrageousness of his past work such as Doom Generation and Nowhere. A bisexual college student stumbles upon a possible conspiracy when hes' not having random sex with cute strangers or fantasizing about his cute but dumb jock "straight" roommate. It features a great soundtrack, an attractive cast and funny shenanigans. A really fun movie.

 

Biutiful = Spanish film starring Javier Bardem about a father who's trying to get his affairs in order before he dies of terminal illness. This film is simply beautiful, emotional and stunning. Javier Bardem is an amazing actor and knocks this one out of the park.

 

Midnight In Paris = I'm really pleased with Woody Allen's last few films. This was a delighful, quirky story about a guy in Paris who finds himself time traveled back to the past at the stroke of midnight, where he gets to hang out with legendary literary figures and artists such as Ernest Hemingway, Gertrude Stein and the Fitzgeralds. I normally don't care for Owen Wilson, but I found his performance in this not as irritating.

 

Beginners = A very sweet film about a man (yummy Ewan McGreggor) whose still mourning the death of his father, who came out of the closet a few years back after the death of their mother and lived a very happy, fabulous gay lifestyle. He meets a cute French girl at a party and begins to fall hard for her. This is a nice tale about love and loss.

 

Cowboys & Aliens = I was surprised how much I enjoyed this sci-fi/western hybrid. Daniel Craig is oh so yummy, and seeing him swagger in cowboy gear was worth the price of admission alone. The story was clichéd at times, but it's a big budget Hollywood flick and it managed to entertain, so I didn't mind. The aliens turned out to be really dorky looking, with these DUH expressions on their face. This was a lot of fun.

 

The Thing = This film was not loved by critics, didn't do well at the Box Office, and yet I found myself surprised at how much I enjoyed it, especially considering I hate remakes/reimaginings of horror films. It's basically a prequel to the 1982 John Carpenter film, that tells the story of what happened at the Norwegian camp prior to Carpenter's film. I was surprised by the gory monster attacks and giddily smiled like a kid as each attack was more brutal and over-the-top graphic. The CGI heavy climax was a bit much, but all in all not a bad film. I enjoyed it a lot.

 

The Skin I Live In = Pedro Almadóvar's latest film is brilliant, a Cronenbergian story about a scientist that's working on a new tough skin and the guinea pig he's using. This is one of those films that you can't really go into detail without revealing more, but it's well worth the payoff. Almadóvar also draws inspiration from one of his favorite films, Hitchcock's Vertigo, a masterpiece about obsession and identity, whose themes are just as strongly presented here. This is by far one of the best films of this year!

 

Weekend = A smart, insightful film about 2 guys who meet at a bar and spend the weekend together, getting to know each other and slowly unpeeling layers of themselves. Both actors were handsome bearded hotties and gave great performances. This film really makes you recall past encounters with handsome strangers that have stayed with you even if things never worked out. A very good gay film.

 

Vanishing On 7th Street = This movie was really creepy, about a group of survivors who band together and try to trust each other after most of the population has been "taken" by these dark, whispering shadows. While the bickering and mistrust between the characters becomes slightly irritating, it's also an accurate depiction of how people would react if such an event took place. Those whispering shadows really creeped me out in some scenes. The ending was rather weak, but otherwise a strong horror film.

 

Melancholia = Lars von Trier's new film that deals with depression and the end of the world. Kirsten Dunst is Justine, a young woman on her wedding day, trudging along through the event with a sincere effort to pretend that she's enjoying it, while her sister Claire (Charlotte Gainsbourg) struggles to keep the chaos to a minimum. As the film progresses Justine loses her ability to fake her happiness and Claire's anxiety begins to rise as a planet known as Melancholia comes closer in orbit to Earth. She's terrified that it will crash into Earth, despite her husband's attempt to reassure her that it will only pass close by the Earth's atmosphere but not cause any harm. Director von Trier has openly spoken about his struggles with depression and anxiety, and in this film he evokes both emotions with realistic candor.

 

Longhorns = This movie is really cute. It takes place in Texas in 1982. Frat boy Kevin thinks that his phase of jerking off his buddies and going down on them is just a phase that all boys go through until he meets openly gay Cesar and begins falling for him. There's lots of naked men, a cool retro soundtrack, and a very sweet story about a guy realizing that he's falling in love with another guy.

Samuel Adams Variety Pack Review

I recently picked up a Samuel Adams variety pack case of their beers, featuring 6 different types of beers. Here's my verdict....

Boston Lager - This beer is tasty and has a nice, smooth aftertaste. Very good. It's a great beer to drink ice cold on a hot summer day.

Winter Lager - Another tasty beer. This one supposedly has cinnamon, orange zest and ginger, but I don't really taste them. Still, the flavor is smooth and not bitter. Yummy!

Chocolate Bock - I was pleasantly surprised by this beer. I was thinking that chocolate flavor added to beer would be nasty, but it's actually not bad at all. This brew is aged on a bed of cocoa so you get a subtle cocoa flavor.

Old Fezziwig Ale - Meh... this one is not too great. It has a semi bitter aftertaste. This one was named after a character in Dicken's A Christmas Carol, a story which I always hated, about a holiday that I hate, but that has nothing to do with the fact that I don't care for it. Tasting this on a hot summer day would make me turn to water instead.

Holiday Porter - Ewww! Bitter and nasty is the only way I can describe this beer. With each sip the flavor got worse and after a few sips I found myself pouring the rest of it down the sink. Nasty!

Black & Brew - This is a coffee stout, and like their Chocolate Bock the flavor was surprisingly not bad at all. You do get a nice espresso flavor that goes down relatively smoothly.

Getting to the bottom of things!

As far as sax goes, bottoming can be a tough job.I'm not referring to the pain of taking a big penis. I'm talking about all the prep work one has to do before the act. Yes, i'm talking about douching. It irks me when guys who want to hook up with you don't give you advanced notice and want you to be ready to go in like 10 minutes. Sorry buddy, but unless you want a mess on your sheets, tool and/or torso, you need to give me advanced notice.

Yes, cleaning oneself can sometimes be a chore. I prefer having as much advanced notice as possible, so I can be fully ready and as clean as possible. If I know a day ahead of time i'll watch what I eat or even try not eating much, if anything at all. And for all those sex advice blogs that think it's no big deal and that cleaning the mess is part of the fun, try telling that to a guy who's wearing the remains of your last meal all over his penis. So yes, being a bottom can be a pain in the ass at times (no pun intended, haha), so for all you eager tops, give a guy a break and practice some patience. Give us bottoms time to do our thing so that you can do your thing mess-free. ;-)

My favorite albums of 2011 so far....

Crystal Castles - crystal castles = More crazy noise from this duo. I saw them earlier this year and their show was a loud assault of insanity on your senses. Fun fun! Baptism, Year Of Silence and Celestica are 3 of my favorite songs of 2011.

 

Ladytron - gravity the seducer = I heart this band and this new album was a departure from their beat heavy past releases, but it soon infected me like their other music. I got to see them live this year as well, great show! At any given time a song from this album will creep into my head.

 

Holy Ghost - holy ghost = I got into this band because they were opening for Cut Copy and I was supposed to go to the show, but a damn flu bug ruined that so I didn't get to see them live. Still, their synthesizer, 80's retro style music is great!

 

Freezepop - imaginary friends = This is a fun synthpop band and their new release, along with 2 new band members, gave them a nice boost. I saw them live in.... shit, I don't remember if it was earlier this year or last year! Forgive me, i'm almost 40. Anyways, love this band and this album was really good!

 

Junior Boys - it's all true = I heart the Junior Boys, and this album became the soundtrack to my summer, especially my trip to NYC in July.

 

Fujiya & Miyagi - ventriloquizzing = This album instantly hooked me, with it's lazy, mellow delivery and funny lyrics that have become their staple. Sixteen Shades Of Black And Blue is probably my favorite song this year.

 

PJ Harvey - let england shake = I worship the ground this woman walks on, and this new political album where she reflects on her homeland of England is as strong and intense as anything she's ever released. I saw her perform this year and she was amazing.

 

Babasonicos - a proposito = The new release from these Argentinos is really good. I love this band and got to see them live a few years back. I hope their tour promoting this album comes to the US because i'd love to see them again!

 

De/Vision - popgefahr the remix = Ok this is cheating, as the original songs on this album were released the year before, but this remix album was released this year so i'm counting it. I love this band, I love the lead singer (DROOL), and this remix album is a double album, so you get 2 different remixes of the same song. Awesomeness!

 

Death Cab For Cutie - codes and keys = I saw this album at the store but waited a few weeks to purchase it as it was around the time of the Junior Boys release, and I was eager to get that one first. This turned out to be a very solid album from the Death Cab dudes. I've loved their past releases and this is another good one.

 

Men - talk about body = JD Samson of Le Tigre formed this band and the songs on it were catchy, fun dance ditties. I had a chance to see them live with another great band, CSS, but it was in the middle of the work week and my lazy bear butt never got around to asking for the next day off so I didn't go. Still, a good release from JD!

 

Cut Copy - zonoscope = I eagerly awaited this release as I loved Cut Copy's last release, one of the best albums ever. This one is not as good as it's predecessor, but it's still a solid release that demands a few listens before you finally enjoy it. I'm still pissed that I missed seeing this band's show this year. I saw them in 2009 and it was one of the most amazing shows i'd ever been to, a high energy, positive vibe experience that felt like being on ecstacy at a rave. Oh well, there will be other times hopefully.

 

I may have forgotten some or have some that I didn't realize were released in 2011. I bought the new Tori Amos album but I haven't really listened to it as I was in the middle of really getting into the new Ladytron, Junior Boys and Babasonicos releases when I bought it. Plus, Tori's last few efforts haven't been all that. I'm sure next year i'll discover an artist that I like that released an album this year, just like this year I discovered some cool artists that released work in 2010, such as The Pinker Tones from Spain.

More Bear Paw Ink

So i've been pondering getting another bear paw tattoo for a while now. I had decided that the most likely placement would be above my ass cheek. Well today I decided to get it done.

I wanted to try out this shop in San Francisco that a few people had recommended and i'd been curious about. I walked in and there were no other customers there. The artist was a cool, nice dude named Michael. After talking to him about the tattoo idea I had, he went over some sketches with me and he came up with a simple one I liked, light blue, outlined in black. So I decided to go for it and get it done. After he finnished it, he asked if I wanted to try some shading around the pawprint, to give it some more character. I had originally mentioned the color orange and he showed me a sketch idea of it with orange shading around. I liked it so I told him yeah and he added a nice orange shade around it. So no, this is not an excuse to show my ass, but just to show my new ink, number 8.

The other side isn't any greener...

I've always complained about men and how difficult they are to be with. Recently I've been talking a lot with a straight buddy of mine and his frustration with this chick he's been trying to get to know makes me realize that women got their own unique set of issues that make them a pain in ass to be with as well. With their hyper-sensitivity and moodiness, I can see that women don't make it any easier for straight dudes. With that said I think i'll continue to be single for as long as I can....

About Frenums

Today I was with a dude with a Frenum piercing. The jewelry wasn't metal, which was nice, 'cause I don't care much for the flavor of metal. I found it easier to maneuver the task than with a Prince Albert. He was a fun bear too.

Ultraman Crabby

Today I stopped at my local collectibles shop and picked up an Ultraman Mebius figure. I didn't care too much for that show but the figure is sweet and comes with several accessories.

Now that we're in the holiday season I find myself slightly crabbier than usual. I think Xmas is lame but I'm trying not to be such a negative bitch. People say " 'tis the season to be jolly" but all I see are people getting overly stressed about things and rushing around like chickens with their heads cut off. Shopping centers are a nightmare to be at, and everyone seems to be more on edge. There's nothing jolly about that. But I will try to control myself and reply to Merry Christmas greetings with "same to you" instead of the "FUCK OFF!" that i'd like to reply with. ;-)

Intrusive Questions

I have nothing to write about at the moment so I thought i'd answer these questions that I found on other blogger's sites.

 

1. How old were you when you knew you were gay?

When I was young I always had a romantic "thing" for dudes. Then as a teenager in the locker rooms is when I figured out exactly what it was.

2. Have you ever had sex with the opposite sex?

Yeah and it's not as bad as some gay men would have you believe.

3. Who was the first person you came out to?

Myself.

4. Are you out to your family?

My parents know, my brother knows. Everyone else knows too, we just didn't have that talk. And if they don't know they're blind.

5. Do you want children?

No my cats are enough.

6. Do you have more gay friends or straight friends?

I actually have more straight friends. I get along great with straight females and I tend to get along better with straight dudes as well. Lesbians are cool but gay men tend to be too much drama at times.

7. Were you out in school?

Not really.

8. Is your best friend the same sex as you?

No but she's a gay man trapped in the body of a woman.

9. If your best friend is the same sex, have you ever had sex with them?

No but she and I have kissed before. We were drunk and goofing around.

10. Have you ever done crystal meth?

Nah. The only drug I ever enjoyed was acid back in my teens/early twenties.

11. Have you ever been in a sling?

Yep, got put there by a hot otter.

12. Have you ever done a 3-way?

Yes. 3-way, 4-way, 5-way....

13. Have you ever dressed in drag?

No

14. Would you date a drag queen?

Nah 'cause I like men with facial hair and naturally hairy bodies, and in order to successfully pull off the drag they'd have to shave.

15. Are you 'fixed in your ways' as it were?

Yes I am. Aren't we all to some degree?

Original 15. Are you a top/bottom or truly versatile?

More bottom although I do top on occassion.

16. Cher or Bette?

Bette. She's just more naturally sassy.

17. Have you dated someone of a different ethnicity?

Yes I have.

18. Been to Fire Island? Saugatuck? Key West? Ft. Lauderdale? Palm Springs?

I wouldn't be caught dead at Fire Island, where the hell is Saugatuck? Key West and Ft. Lauderdale i'll pass on. Yes to Palm Springs but that was for the Coachella music festival.

Original 18. Have you ever barebacked?

Yes I have.

19. How many Madonna CDs do you own?

Most of them except for her last one. I didn't care for her dip into hip hop too much.

20. Name of your first love?

Danny

21. Do you still talk to them?

No

22. Does size matter?

It kinda does but at the same time if you don't know how to use it then it doesn't. A small or average guy can leave you just as sore and gaping as mr. ten incher if he does it right. ;-)

23. Biggest turn on?

Facial hair, body hair, tattoos.

24. Biggest turn off?

Narcissism.

25. Ever been harassed due to your orientation?

I recall some kids in high school didn't talk to me 'cause they thought I was gay.

26. Worst gay stereotype that applies to you?

I own a lot of damn shoes. In fact, I just talked myself into not going into a certain store to see if those shoes I saw the other day were still there.

27. Ever been to a pride rally?

Many many times.

28. Would you marry if you could?

No. I believe that us gay men have the right be get married, but I also believe that marriage is not for everyone, and i'm pretty sure that it's most definitely not for me.

29. Would you rather be rich and smart or young and beautiful?

Rich and smart. Youth and beauty don't last, but if you're rich you can make them last for a long time.

30. Do you sculpt your eyebrows?

Hell no!

31. Do you trim your body hair?

Hell no!!!! Ok I do trim my back but that's because it gets too damn hairy and I have no desire to look like an escaped extra from the Planet Of The Apes franchise.

32. Ever had sex with more than one person in a day?

Yes.

33. Ever been to an orgy?

Yes. I have a bear friend who hosts them every so often. I've been known to attend. :-)

34. Which character in "The Women" best reflects you?

Never saw that flick.

35. Favorite gay expression?

Like OMG!

36. How may 'exes' do you have?

3

37. Do you believe in fairies?

No

38. Do you have any tattoos?

7 and counting.

39. Do you have any piercings?

Just nose and used to have my tongue but I took it out and it healed. I'm still debating whether to get my nipples done or not.

40. Would you date a smoker?

Probably not.

41. If you are male, do you know many lesbians?

Yes I do.

42. Do you know anyone who has died from HIV?

No I haven't.

43. Are you part of a gay organization?

No i'm not.

44. Is your gym cruisy?

I don't go to a gym.

45. Grinder or Scruff?

Neither. Until just recently I found out what Scruff was.

46. Are your best years behind or in front of you?

In front of me or so I hope.

47. Got Porn?

Yes!

48. Make out music?

Massive Attack is good, or Boards Of Canada.

49. Ever been in love with a straight guy?

Nope, just lustful fantasies.

50. Did you ever have sex with him?

We got drunk and kissed, but it was more of a bromance kinda thing.

51. Have you ever been to a nude beach?

No but I once gave a friend directions to one that I found on the internet when he called me up.

52. Have you ever been to a bath house?

Yes I have.

53. Ever had sex in public?

Nope.

54. What gay gene did you miss out?

I'm not a flamboyant queen, I don't give a rat's ass about Aberzombie & Fitch....

De/Vision - Popgefahr The Mix

Today I received in the mail the new remix album by De/Vision, one of my favorite bands. It has some great mixes on it, some of them better than the original versions. Here's hoping they tour the US again so I can drool over singer Steffen Keth again.

Booze + Dishes = Bad

This is what happens when you let drunken friends balance a plate of food on their lap.

3 Things

Rant
This rant has to do with all the websites and blogs online where the owner is under the delusion that they're some high fashion consultant and feel the need to tell people how to dress, what to wear and not to wear. In particular, I find it annoying when people write blogs and articles complaining about men wearing flip-flops. Honestly, who really gives a fuck what a guy wears on his feet? I agree that it's not appropriate wear at the office, but other than that why is it such a big deal? I've read an alarming number of blogs and sites where people bitch and complain about something as insignificant as them seeing a guy wearing flip-flops with jeans at the local taco shack or coffee shop. I personally happen to find that many guys look hot with jeans and flip-flops anyway.  In the end who really gives a crap????

Halloween
Halloween weekend was pretty cool and mellow. I went out with some friends, did some drinking, did some dancing, went to a fun haunted house, and ate too much candy. One friend got way too drunk and made an ass of herself, embarrassing herself and everyone else that was around her (including some of her co-workers). Apparantly practicing restraint while drinking with co-workers is something that never occurred to her and now she's paranoid because they're all suddenly acting distant. Can we say DUH???? She's now on this "i'm going to monitor my drinking" kick but I know her well enough to know that this will last as long as a plate of tuna in front of a cat.

Advice
An out-of-state friend has been e-mailing me and telling me the details of some dude he's been messing around with. Apparantly this dude he's met is bisexual and doesn't have much experience with guys (or so he claims). But after receiving his first rimjob from my friend he wants to try more and wants my friend to be the 1st guy to pop his manhole. My friend is asking me for advice 'cause he's afraid he'll have performance issues. I told him not to sweat it and just enjoy it. I just find it amusing that i'm being asked for advice on something like this.

2 Different Dudes, Same Name

This week I got together with 2 dudes, both named Marco. Marco #1 was a cute 24 year old bear, while Marco #2 was a thin framed early 40's latino. Although both were fun and sleazy in their own separate way, I think I enjoyed Marco #1 more. That was pretty much the highlight of my week. At first when I sat down and thought about what to write, I kept drawing a blank, couldn't think of anything significant that had happened to me. Then I realized that getting together with 2 dudes with the same name was something significant. I guess my attitude about sex is very casual and non-chalant; it's as normal and average to me as eating or going to work.

Nudity In Public and Ladytron

Last Sunday I spent the day in San Francisco. First I attended the Folsom Street Fair where I got to see plenty of naked butts and dicks and the usual assortment of people dressed in leather. I snapped lots of pics, but since I can't post 'em on Facebook I thought i'd share some here. Hot asses, nice dicks and straight up nakedness.

What I also found really hot were these 2 dudes dressed like officers that got up on stage and started dancing. Hotness hotness hotness!

Later that evening I went up to the Regency Ballroom to see Ladytron. They were good as usual. Much better than the last time I saw them. However, that's partly due to the fact that the dumb bitch I went with last time ruined the show by being a drama queen and throwing a fit. Needless to say I never bothered going to a show with that dumb twat again! It took 'em a while to gain some momentum, opening softly with Soft Power. A few songs later in the set they really took off musically, with an awesome 1-2-3 punch of Runaway, Ace Of Hz and Little Black Angel. Other highlights were Mirage, White Gold, International Dateline, Discotraxx and an awesome finnish with Seventeen. Helen looked cute in a white gown-like blouse and these flowery things in her hair. Mira also looked cute wearing a black dress with cherries, but at the same time she looked bored. However she usually has that unenthusiastic expression so it might just be how she is. Opening act Polaris At Noon was pretty decent. The other dude, Sonoio, was kinda dull, just sitting on the floor while this light panel lit on and off, and he appeared to be lipsynching his techno songs. He seemed to have the personality of a pretentious douchebag too, as he never once engaged with the audience or even aknowledged this obvious fan who was at the front of the stage and waving to him.

It was a great night nonetheless. Hot dudes and live music from a favorite band, who could ask for more?

10 Things That Are Running Through My Mind At This Very Moment.

Even though I numbered them, that doesn't signify anything other than a tool which to list them more easily.

 

1) I have a tendency to drive to a 7-11 that's further away instead of going to the one that's practically walking distance to my place because at the farther location there's a guy who works there that I think is cute and he's always friendly and asks me how i'm doing. But i've been good and responded with "i'm fine, and you?" instead of "i'd be doing better if I could bring you back to my place so I could explore every inch of your naked body with my mouth and tongue and then force you to do dirty, filthy, forbidden things to me!"

 

2) I'd like to decapitate the assholes who were behind the closure of the Taco Bravo that was up the street from my place. Goddamned those $1.50 bean burritos and super nachos were killing my arteries slowly but surely, but fuck it, i'm going to die anyway, can't I have a little fun while I sink into the abyss of high blood pressure darkness??????

 

3) The more I think about it the more i'm not sure I want to get my nipples pierced because the first guy who yanks on them will find himself with an axe in his face and i'll find myself trying to shake a murder rap. I'll end up in prison, where i'll get all the free sex I want, but I think I prefer to control when, where and by whom I get raped.

 

4) I love it when God send a clear, direct message to my hint-challenged head. Earlier I asked him to keep me from checking my e-mail for a certain e-mail from a certain somebody. If there were an e-mail from this certain somebody it's one that I really need to ignore anyway, so low and behold, when I clicked on the e-mail link to check it my computer mysteriously shut off instead. That's the kind of message I need God. Either that or a hard slap across the face will do.

 

5) I need to accept that fact that some people are just abominably stupid and instead of complaining about or trying to fix them I need to be thankful that i'm not them.

 

6) The song "Hysteria" by Def Leppard is a really good song! Fuck you 80's hair band haters!

 

7) I need to stop thinking about that cute latino that seemed to be cruising me at the laundromat a few weeks ago and just accept that my chance to get him back to my apartment to give him the best blowjob of his life has passed.

 

8) I really need to stop drinking with a certain somebody. Let's just say that some people make complete asses of themselves when they're drunk and while it can be amusing, it's also annoying and embarrassing.

 

9) I need to lose about 5 pounds so that ninja costume I bought won't fit me so tight. Yeah, I plan on ripping it up anyway to go along with the idea of being a zombified ninja for Halloween, complete with shiruken stars sticking out of my face, so I guess I should nevermind that thought.

 

10) I need to finally accept the fact that Bigfoot and the Loch Ness Monster were hoaxes and stop having violent fantasies about dismembering the dumbasses who were behind those hoaxes and admitted to them. You bastards ruined a geek's childhood dream! Other kids can choose to keep or not keep their fucking stupid Santa Claus, but how dare you take away my Sasquach and Nessie??? Oh the injustice of it all!

A bear and a kitty

Here's some shots of me and my kitty Lulu. That's all, nothing else to say.

Sticky Tricks, Tattoos and the Undead

I recently got together with this dude that i've kinda known for some time. I invited him over to my place and i'm sure you know what we did. It was fun and he gave me some helpful info about stuff i've been pondering. The next day he texts me and asks if I wanna meet up again. Sure, why not? So I invite him over. The next day he texts again, and though I was a bit tired I said yeah and had him over, again. And the next day I get another text again, asking me what time I get off work and if i'm free. I pondered it for a while but then said no, made up some excuse. He seemed disappointed and upset. He claimed he was really craving "it". Apparantly the 3 days in a row wasn't enough for him. And I thought I was bad? A few days later he calls again. I didn't answer and then seconds later he texts, asking if i'm free. Ugh! I spent most of last weekend avoiding his texts. I decided to be civil and reply to his text yesterday, as I was busy out with friends anyway and would have an excuse to say no. Instead he asks me for advice regarding his cats, who are spraying inside his place. I cautiously replied, expecting the true motive of his texting to reveal itself. But it never did. I was relieved. Not that I don't enjoy spending time with him, but when you start to want to stick like glue, that makes me uneasy. Yeah, i'm one of those types.

When I wasn't busy avoiding certain texts last weekend, I decided to stop by my tattoo shop and inquire about my latest tattoo idea, maybe put a deposit and make an appointment for the next coming weeks. When I asked for my tattoo artist the owner then tells me that he's in Mexico getting married and plans on opening his own shop, maybe down south (as in Southern California area). My heart sank as I really liked him (his work, that is, not him..... though he is kinda.... ahh nevermind!). So the owner asks me if I want to check out books of some other artists there. After flipping through a few I found this one artist who's work was really good. Turns out he was sitting there in the shop, had some free hours, so I showed him the design, went to the ATM to get out the $$ and 2 hours later I walked out with fresh ink. It's a cross with a rosary draped around it on my left arm. I've been wanting to get a rosary tattooed for some time, and this design really spoke to me when I saw it. Wasn't planning on getting inked so soon again but that's how the cookie crumbled. And i'm already thinking of other ideas for future ink.... perhaps a small bearpaw on my butt.  ;-)

Last night I attended the Zombie-O-Rama fest in my town. It's the 3rd year they had it, I went last year and had fun. Basically it's a festival in downtown area where people are invited to attend dressed like zombies. They have vendors selling food and merchandise, businesses around the area have drink and food specials and will post signs on their door saying "this is a zombie-friendly establishment", they'll have live entertainment and when the sun goes down they'll show a zombie film outdoors on a huge screen in the middle of the park. Last year it was Sean Of The Dead, this year they showed Fido. I got me some make-up and went to my friend's, where we put on our make-up and fake blood and then walked to the event, which is a few blocks from her place. I was pleased with how my make-up came out, with fake shards of glass sticking out of my bloody face. There were lots of cool people dressed in really cool zombie costumes and make-up. My favorite was this girl who was walking her dog, only the dog leash was her intestines that were sticking out of her side. It was a lot of fun watching the reaction of drivers and passersby when they would see us walking down the street, all bloody and rotting.  I'll definitely be making this a yearly tradition.

A random thought on a possible future purchase...

Saturday night I had a guest over. We were.... um.... doing "things" and when his body reached the "promised land" he made a lot of noise. Enough to make me worry that the neighbors might have heard. Perhaps I should invest in a gag ball.....

Mail Goodies

Yesterday I had 2 things waiting for me in the mail. One was an Ultra-Act Ultraman Leo figure that I got off ebay a few weeks ago. The other was a free cd that I got by calling in to the radio station that was giving away free copies. The band is called Cause And Effect and their music was being played on a local college radio station that I listen to frequently. I seemed to enjoy their music, a synth-pop/electronic mix that recalled the classic music of Depeche Mode as well as current favorites De/Vision, Apoptygma Berzerk and Holy Ghost to name a few. The DJ said to call the station to get a copy of their latest EP, so I did and yesterday it arrived in the mail. It consists of 4 good electro songs. So now I got a geeky electro soundtrack to go along with my Ultraman figure.

The weekend is upon us and I currently have no plans, although something usually pops up in the form of a
text/e-mail getting an invite to do something. Maybe i'll make a batch of that good, strong Sangria I made last
weekend, where just one glass got me good and toasted. Sangria by itself has a tendency to get me drunk, but I added peach schnapps, triple sec and cranberry juice that gives it an extra punch. Maybe i'll see about getting a ticket to Treasure Island Music fest as I got an invite to join some friends. Cut Copy and Empire Of The Sun are headlining the day they're going, sounds fun. Perhaps i'll try painting something as I have a few ideas forming in my head. Shopping is out of the question; I have enough shoes, t-shirts, shorts, underwear and tank tops to last me well into the next 3 summers. No I don't need another pair of Converse, I don't need another pair of Vans... I don't need another pair of Adidas....

Neurosis and Sociopathy

I recently hung out with a female friend who happens to be a Cancer (as in zodiac sign). I quickly found myself drinking more booze so that I could get good and toasted and thus render her neurotic yapping less irritating. She really makes a fool of herself simply by opening her mouth, feeling the need to share each and every neurotic, paranoid thought that comes into her head. She doesn't realize that this only paints her as a basketcase. I've told her countless times not to do this type of stuff, sharing her neurotic insecurities. Doing that only produces two results: it scares off the stable people and attracts the unstable people. Does she listen? No! Half of the conversation she had was her whining about these "friends" of hers who she's having issues with, are mean to her, manipulate her, play mind games with her. If she would listen to me and stop sharing her intimate insecurities with others she wouldn't constantly find herself the target of sociopaths who get off fucking with her mentally. I admit that it's quite easy to fuck with this friend's head. A simple, suggestive comment can easily send her spinning like one of those toys that you pull the string and let 'em go. Sad but true!

 

And then there's this "gay" male friend who is also a Cancer and suffers from the same condition. I put gay in parentheses because he's no longer living that lifestyle, because it never worked out for him. The reason for this is because his neurotic clinginess scared off every decent guy he'd meet. I told him countless times that guys need space, you can't get all clingy on a guy you've just met or he'll bail. Unless he's an unstable basketcase, in which case he'll stick around and you'll soon regret ever having met him. I recall listening in utter horror as he would send men running away by doing things such as asking "so where do you see this thing going?" halfway through the first date. And like my female friend, every thing that I said to him went in through one ear and out the other. So i've pretty much given up.

 

Now i'm not saying that every single person who is a Cancer is like this because it's kinda ridiculous to pidgeonhole someone based on their zodiac sign, but on the other hand i've run into quite a number of Cancers who were like this. I think the only Cancer i've ever met that wasn't like this is my brother. He's always been a happy, fun-loving and confident guy, which is completely the opposite of the other Cancers i've met. I need to meet more Cancers like my brother so I could get rid of this silly notion that I have that all Cancers are hyper-sensitive neurotics. And before ya'll go getting offended by this keep in mind that I also place the microscope under my own zodiac sign, Capricorns. I think we have a tendency to be bitchy, judgemental, mean-spirited, sarcastic, unforgiving and stubborn as fuck. The fact that a high percentage of serial killers are Capricorns doesn't surprise me at all. Not that i'm admitting to having sociopathic tendencies, that's a thought that I don't bother entertaining anymore. Besides, all the human remains I used to store in my freezer I threw out years ago.

Annoyances and Loud Music!

rantSince i've gotten a tattoo on my right arm (technically on the deltoid area), i've noticed how many people have a tendency to touch, grab, smack and pull on that arm. This is fucking annoying me. What's really annoying is when you tell people "don't touch that arm, I just got a tat there" and 5 minutes later they're stupid asses do it again. Maybe if I punch their fucking teeth out they'd get it? A lot of people say "sorry, I didn't know", but many of them do know that I got a tattoo, and maybe i'm being a picky bitch, but you don't need to have a PhD to know that when you have ink sliced into your skin it's basically a wound and it's not going to heal overnight. So when you hit, scratch, grab and pull at that area it's going to hurt you stupid dumbasses! Hopefully no ink gets scratched off it otherwise i'm going to grab a knife and slice a chunk off your skin and see how you like it. I swear the next person who taps, grabs, smacks or pulls at my arm i'm going to fucking bury a hatchet in their goddamned faces!

In other news, last night I went to see Soundgarden. All 4 of the original members got back together for a reunion tour. Soundgarden were one of my favorites in the 90's so I was happy when they regrouped for this tour so I can see them because I never got a chance to see them in their heyday. They played a 2 hour set consisting of songs from all their albums. Chris Cornell (HOT!!!!) was sporting long hair and a beard, damn he looked good! I was hoping he'd remove his shirt but it didn't happen. But their live versions of Outshined, Rusty Cage, Fell On Black Days, Spoonman, The Day I Tried To Live, Searching With My Good Eye Closed, Jesus Christ Pose and the awesome finale of Slaves & Bulldozers were simply awesome! Today i'm tired and my legs hurt from standing so long, but that's what beds and pain pills are for.

Fresh Ink

This last Friday I got my 6th tattoo, a skull and crossbones/heart design. I got the design from the Italian company called Tokidoki, that makes Japanese style toys, clothes and make-up. I've been buying their stuff for quite a while now, and have always been drawn to their crossbones and heart design.

When I saw a skull version of this design (with 2 facing silouhette skulls in the heart) I immediately fell in love with it and knew that it was a tattoo that I wanted. So this week I made an appointment at the tattoo shop I frequent, and the next day I went in and got it inked.

I like this design for a variety of reason, it's representative of several things in my life. That got me to thinking about what I would tell people when they ask, because you know that there's always people who have to ask why you got that tattoo, what it means, etc. I admit that this is something that's always kind of annoyed me. People always ask me about my forearm tattoo (a star-arrow design that's the symbol of the Science Patrol for the Ultraman show). Usually i'll tell them and they'll react with a blank "oh", because most people don't know who Ultraman is anyway. I just feel that it's an intrusive, slightly dumb question. I don't go around asking people why they wear the clothes they wear, why they wear the shoes they wear, why they wear their hair like that, why they're wearing that color make-up, why they're driving that car, why they're married to that douchebag.... Maybe it's a silly pet peeve or hang-up of mine, but I always find myself a bit put off when people ask me. Perhaps if I felt that they were sincerely trying to get to know something about me, but I find that most of the time it's just to satisfy they're morbid curiousity. I've considered making up a long, intricate, explicit story just to make fools of them. Or I could just say "it's kind of personal" and leave it at that. I think in the end it all ties in to the fact that I tend to have strong boundaries and don't feel the need to share every intimate detail of my life with a perfect stranger. So before I go rambling on and on i'll just end this blog by saying I really love my new tattoo.

Things that I learned while on vacation in NYC

This last weekend I had a fantastic time in NYC visiting some friends. It couldn't have been better and turned out much better than what I had hoped for. I hadn't been back to NYC in about 6 or 7 years, so I took advantage of the opportunity when a friend invited me up there to visit her this summer. But anyways, here's a few things I learned while I was up there the last few days.

 

My friends truly do rock! - Yes I already know this, but it's nice to get repeated reminders of how awesome your friends are. From the friends who hosted me in NYC to seeing my other friend whom I hadn't seen in about 2 years, and my other friends who texted me and sent me e-mails, telling me how happy they were that I was having fun, the entire trip was an awesome reminder that I am truly blessed with some awesome, incredible people in my life!

 

My luggage choice rocked! - When I arrived at SFO to catch my flight to NYC a cute stewardess passed me by and complimented me on my luggage. It was a small, standard luggage except for the fact that the color/pattern was checkerboard rainbow colored. Here's a pic.

 

 

I wanted to get something that wasn't the standard black so that it would stand out amid the sea of black luggages. Looks like I did well judging by the many stares and smiles I got from people. They were either pleased with my choice or were laughing at how obvious it was that i'm a damn homo!

 

Sometimes love really does stink! - So Saturday night I stayed up until the sun came out with my gal pal whom I hadn't seen in 2 years. We got drunk at one gay bar (The Monster) where a piano player was belting out showtunes while a small crowd (myself included) sang along. We also hung out at The Stonewall Inn, where they were having a skintight contest upstairs that composed of dudes wearing very tight latex superhero outfits for a prize. Anyways, my cute friend immediately got the attention of some cute young dude, whom i'll call Gigan. When she introduced him to me he then introduced me to his friend, i'll call him Chameleking. Long story short, Gigan had the hots for my gal pal, who really wasn't interested in him, at least not in a romantic way. Gigan was trying to set me up with Chameleking, who it soon became obvious that he had the hots for Gigan. Gigan claimed to be straight and into girls, but at one point when I asked him what he liked he just kinda shrugged his shoulders. Then at one point Gigan went into the bathroom and Chameleking followed him. After a few minutes Gigan came out and he seemed to be kinda pushing Chameleking away, as if to say no. I assume that Chameleking tried to get romantic. At one point I was dancing and talking with Chameleking but I caught him looking at Gigan with these sad puppy dog eyes that made it obvious he was suffering from a serious "straight" boy crush. This made me feel sad for Chameleking as it was a reminder that, like the old 80's song so eloquently puts it, love stinks! Oh, and my gal pal was not really interested in Gigan because she was more into a cute Incan waiter that she saw at the other bar, who turned out to have a girlfriend.

 

New York has a LOT of hot men! - Not that this was a surprise. I would assume that in any big city there would be an abundance of very sexy, hot men. I guess I found myself overwhelmed by the amount of them, left and right, everywhere you looked. I found it very distracting to try and focus on the attractions that didn't involve a half dressed male hottie in summer attire.

 

Live theatre really is great! - It had been years since i've seen a live show, so I was very happy when my friend surprised me with tickets to see The Addams Family Musical, which starred Brooke Shields as Morticia and Roger Reese (of Cheers fame) as Gomez. The majority of the actors were fantastic, the young actress who played Wednesday had a fantastic voice, and the live sets were really impressive. I had a great time at the show and it was a nice reminder that I need to see more live theatre, it really is great!

 

Fear of flying? Just pop them pills! - There's a part of me that gets anxious when being on a plane. I blame my parents. They are paranoid worry-warts who raised me and my siblings to be afraid of everything. In fact I deliberately did NOT tell my mother I was flying to New York as she would just get paranoid and worry herself into hysteria with fear that her "baby" would perish in a horrible plane crash. I decided to counter this ridiculous anxiety of mine by popping as many sleeping pills/sedatives as I could. It kinda worked too. I didn't really sleep on my overnight flight, but I was so bombed that I found myself not really caring about anything while on the plane either. Thank God for Benadryl, Tylenol PM and Advil PM!

 

The city that never sleeps truly doesn't sleep - I was reminded things really don't close in NYC as I found my drunken ass riding the subway at 4am in the morning, back to Manhattan to crash at my friend's pad. There were so many people on the A train you would've thought it was the middle of the day and not the crack of dawn. I found myself amused as I stared at the passengers, including one very cute gay couple who were totally into each other.

 

It's actually not that difficult to find parking in NYC - My friends drove me around a lot, and I was shocked at how easily they found parking. I truly was expecting it to be the opposite, as I assumed that since parking is an elusive pain in the neck in San Francisco that it would be worse in NYC. Yet my friends easily found parking all parts of the city. My friend did warn me that it was important to pay attention to street signs so as to avoid being towed away.

 

It's not just my imagination or a local thing: I tend to attract coupled dudes - When standing outside the line to see Addams Family The Musical I noticed 2 groups of coupled bears that were next to me kept staring at me. I was wearing a tank top which allowed one to see my bear paw tattoo on my chest so at first I assumed that maybe they were just noticing that. Yet one couple in particular continued to stare at me, and each time I would nonchalantly glance in their direction I would catch them staring at me. Then the next night at the Monster bar there was another group of bears, and one of them who was clearly there with his man kept staring at me. Again I tried to brush it off and assume that maybe he was just noticing what I was wearing or something, but once again I continued to catch him staring at me. I just found it amusing that I tend to get noticed a lot by couples or 1 half of a couple, at least a lot more than I get noticed by apparantly single dudes.

 

 

I'm a city boy at heart - Some people eventually return to their hometowns as they get older or long for the peace and quiet of their hometowns. Fuck that! I grew up in a very small town in the Central Valley, basically in the middle of nowhere California, and the older I get the less longing I have to ever return to live in a small town. I absolutely love big cities, New York and San Francisco being my 2 absolute favorite cities i've ever visited. I was surprised to find myself saying yes when a few friends asked me if I could see myself living in NYC. I've always told myself that the extreme temperatures would keep me from ever living there, but as I get older I actually thing I could handle it. Of course the reality of actually having to venture out in sub zero temperatures in winter might quickly change my mind, but I find myself more open to the idea that I have been in the past. Not that I plan on moving out there, but it's now in the field of why not instead of no way.

Debauchery of an Angel Bear

This weekend was gay pride and I had a fantastic time at the Pink Party in the Castro. Drove up there with one friend and my other cool friend let us crash at her pad. Throughout the week I was undecided on what to wear, or more specifically, I wasn't sure if I should be extra celebratory and wear my black angel wings. After hearing the news Friday night about New York's legalization of gay marriage I decided that I needed to up the ante in celebration, so black angel wings I wore, with my black bear paw t-shirt, grey shorts with little white skull & crossbones on it, and greyish white converse with painted skulls on them. Immediately upon arriving at Castro I knew that my decision to wear angel wings was a good one because I started getting compliments on them left and right, people stopping me to ask where I had bought them at (Hot Topic), people shouting from a few feet away "I love your wings!", etc. My friend and I hit the bars, which were crowded, but we managed to get a few drinks in, me sticking to my staple of Patrón tequila, either a straight-up shot or mixed in a margarita. Soon enough I was quite toasty and extra happy. Then the night began to blur, but I recall making out with a dude from Canada in one of the bars. Actually I recall my hands kinda wandered around and um.... explored, but he responded enthusiastically so I continued. I remember kissing a cute shirtless guy from Ohio outside while dancing to the techno music; I kept running my fingers through his chest hair and fondling his nipples. What can I say? I wanted to be a welcoming Californian! I remember dancing with a cute girl who was from the same area that I grew up in. I remember taking pictures of various wildly dressed people. I remember telling some dudes in a bar that my female friend's rack was nice and all-natural, I remember walking down the street to find a cab and hearing my name called and seeing a friend drive by in a car, waving hi to me. I remember telling the cab driver who drove my drunken ass to my friend's house that my wings couldn't fly me home because I had too much to drink. And most of all I just remember dancing, laughing, smiling and having a blast. I was feeling kinda off when I woke up this morning, and briefly considered attending the gay pride celebration after the parade, but my logical voice reminded me that I was 39 years old, hung over, and within a few hours my energy would deplete and i'd be hating life, wishing I was home in bed. So home I went, took a nap and now i'm beginning to feel half-normal again. But the debauchery was all worth it. Here's two pics of a cute twink dancing around in his underwear, shaking his cute butt. Happy Pride!

 

Flake-O-Rama!

I really hate flakes. Flakey people just annoy me. What I mean by flakes are people who go and cancel plans all the time, many times at the last minute, which is particularly annoying. Lately i've been bombarded by flakes. A few days ago I was supposed to meet up with an out-of-town acquaintance for some fun. He e-mailed me about 7:30am in the morning, letting me know he was in my town, and we exchanged a few e-mail arranging to meet up later. Well his idea of later turned out to be much, much later as the e-mail he was supposed to send me letting me know he was finnished with work and ready never came. I was tired so I went to bed at about 9:30pm. The next morning he e-mails me at about 6:30am, saying sorry for flaking last night but he worked much later and didn't get back to his hotel until almost midnight. Ya know, an earlier e-mail saying something like "hey man, i'm gonna have to work late, you still game or raincheck?" would've been nice. It only takes 30 seconds to send an e-mail or text message. In this day and age, when everyone and their mother owns a cell phone (or pocket computer as I like to call them), unless you're in the middle of performing a 5-hour brain surgery on someone or you're fighting off an army of hungry zombies, there is no excuse for not letting someone know you're going to be late! In his last e-mail he also asked me if I wanted to still get together with him that day. I responded to this e-mail by clicking the delete button and not responding. Screw him! If he can't show common courtesy and ettiquette then he deserves a rude, non-response.

 

Earlier today I was thinking about how it's gay pride month and how i'm looking forward to attending the Pink Party (or Pink Saturday) on pride weekend. For those who don't know it, it's the block party in the Castro (gay) district of San Francisco, the Saturday night before pride. Well today the friend that I was going with let's me know that she might be cancelling because she's not sure she's up for it. Long story short, she went and did something stupid this weekend (the story of her life), and now she's still feeling ill from it. Basically she's being a drama queen and milking the situation for all it's worth. This is the same person who's been making a big deal about how we HAVE TO GO to the pink party this year, OMG we so have to go, we'll get a hotel room and stay in the city for the weekend, it's gonna be awesome, yada yada yada! In fact, she's been saying that for the last few years, yet i've always found myself going with someone else. And that's EXACTLY what i'm going to do this year! I just know that about a week before she's suddenly going to change her mind and want to tag along. I look forward to telling her that it's not possible because i'm going with someone else and there's not enough room in the car, or at their place that i'm staying at, etc, etc. I'll be sure to send her pics and drunken texts from the party, rubbing it in her face just how much fun she's missing out on. I know that's bitchy and mean, but she does this shit all the time! I know that sometimes crap happens and you have to cancel things, but when you do it frequently it becomes less of a "crap happens" situation and only reveals that person to be flakey and unreliable, and who needs an unreliable person? Perhaps that makes me a bitch.... but I believe in giving back what you get. If you give me BS then that's exactly what you're going to get back from me. And I am way too old for games, drama and flakes. Well except for Frosted Flakes. Those are good! Haha!

Testing

Earlier today I was checking my blog. The page came up, but when I clicked on each blog individually it said that the blog had been removed. So i'm posting this to see if this posts up. Bizarre.....

Matthew Montgomery, i'm still waiting for that good film...

I just got finnished watching yet another bad gay film. It starred Matthew Montgomery, an actor who I think is cute and has a nice ass (which he seems to show in most of his movies), but dammit, each and every one of those movies sucked, and not in a good way either! When it comes to indie gay cinema, there are a lot of BAD movies, but occassionally some good ones do rise out of the muck. I just don't understand how he hasn't had the fortune to be in any of those films, being how prolific he's been over the last few years. Socket was probably the closest he got to almost good, but that was ruined by the lead Derek Long, who is one lousy actor, and a script that tried to be like early Cronenberg but not enough. As I browse through the rental history of my Netflix queue I realize that i've given Matthew Montgomery another chance time and time again, and yet each time I haven't been able to get through at least 30 minutes of his films without lowering my head into my hands and thinking "Oh Jesus! That was bad!" I know deep down that it's his bare ass that keeps me coming back for more, but I would like to see that cute ass of his star in a film that i'd actually want to purchase on DVD. Maybe if i'm lucky he'll be having coffee one day and in will walk David Lynch, Darren Aronofsky or Guillermo Del Toro and he will say "hey, you look like you'd be perfect for this role in a film i'm currently working on" and he'll finally get to star in a good film. Oh well, a bear can dream, can't he?

 

A day in the life of a geek bear

This morning started with me getting a bunch of texts from this dude I know. I'll call him Legila (**whenever I disguise someone's name I substitute it for the name of a Japanese monster that has the same first initial**). Legila is the type of dude who tends to whine a lot about being single, how there's no quality guys out there, how come he can't find a decent guy, etc, etc. He claims that all guys want is sex and that it's hard for him to find anyone who is interested in dating. And yet, within a few back and forth texts he's suddenly sending me pictures of his dick. I resisted the urge to educate him on how acting slutty too soon will not land him those quality guys that he seeks. When we Capricorns give advice we sometimes come off as bitchy, and besides, Legila is no spring chicken, so if he doesn't know what to do to get the type of guy he seeks then it's probably pointless to tell him. Then I recall Morrissey from The Smiths-era singing "you shut your mouth, how can you say I go about things the wrong way? I am human and I need to be loved.... just like everybody else does..." On the other hand, Morrissey grew up to be a bitter old queen, so clearly his way was the wrong way, but I digress.....

 

After the oversexed text messages from Mr. I Need Love, I shaved, took a shower, then left the house because today was a gorgeous day and I wasn't about to waste it indoors. I got some coffee then stopped at my favorite japanese bookstore down the street from where I live. Kinokuniya is a cool store because they got books, arts and crafts, cd's and dvd's, clothing (I bought a really cool hoodie there), all sorts of writing pens, cute knick knacks and toys. This visit I was in luck because they had a bunch of Ultraman and Ultraseven mini figures for sale. I love getting those figures, they're cute as hell. The only thing is they come in unmarked boxes so you never know what you're going to get and you might end up with repeats in an attempt to get the entire collection, but that's part of the fun. I got some cool friends who like toys anyway so I usually give my extras to them. Here's 2 group shots of the ones I picked up today:

 

Pic 1: (from left to right: Shapuray Seijin, Telesdon, Banila, Ultraman Zoffy, Dorako, Jiras, Gyeron, Pandon & Red King)

 

 

Pic 2: (from left to right: Seabozu, Dino-Tank, King Joe, Keronia, Gyango, Dada, Baltan II, Ultraseven & Woo)

 

 

 Of course there are 2 figures that I really want and didn't get so i'll be going back soon to get more. Oh the insanity of collecting! After that I met up with a friend and we had lunch and some drinks and a nice chat about serial killers, tattoos, healthcare reform, how the 80's music we grew up with is now considered oldies, artwork, how nothing is playing at the movie theatres that we're interested in watching, and made plans for next weekend. The weather is going to be warm this week and i'm hoping it stays warm next weekend as well.

Flip-Flops = Gay?

In Gregg Araki's latest film, Kaboom, the bisexual main character Smith (played by Thomas Dekker) finds himself lusting over his surfer jock roommate Thor (Chris Zylka). In one scene Smith is talking to his gal pal about Thor, wondering if he's gay. Despite the fact that Thor acts like a typical straight jock, Smith lists down a few examples that lead him to suspect Thor is secretly gay, like the fact that he exfoliates frequently or is always staring at his body in the mirror. However, the smoking gun in Smith's theory that Thor is gay is the fact that he wears nothing but flip-flops. This is complete with a scene that shows Thor opening his closet and looking admiringly at his multiple, multi-brand and colored collection of flips-flops. I laughed really hard at this scene, as I can relate. I have a growing collection of shoes, however, in the last few years, i've found myself with a growing collection of flip-flops as well. Now I don't think the fact that i'm gay and wear flip-flops automatically means that the 2 go hand in hand (or is it foot and foot?), but the fact that my collection is multi-colored to match whatever i'm wearing is the gay part about it, or at least others seem to think so. All my friends tease me about color coordinating my shoes with whatever i'm wearing as being my one gay trait, which is something that i've always been aware of, but it wasn't until one guy pointed out that he loved how my flip-flops always matched whatever else I was wearing that I realized how much I really do it. It makes me wonder if guys who own multiple pairs of flip-flops are more prone to being gay than straight. I know that wearing flip-flops doesn't automatically mean a guy is gay and that a large amount of straight guys wear them all the time, but if they have several pairs, especially in multiple colors, sometimes I wonder. The same guy who pointed out my flip-flops matching whatever i'm wearing seems to think that if a guy wears any colors that aren't black or brown then they're most likely gay. I'm not sure I agree with that, however, I can't see too many straight guys with orange, yellow or light blue flip-flops. Why I have so many pairs I don't really know. I blame stores like Old Navy and Marshall's which sells them for low prices. However, i've bought pricier ones like my pair of Vans or Polo's, so I guess the low price theory doesn't hold water. Ultimately I guess it's my gayness that makes me own multiple pairs. It wasn't until I gathered them all for a photo that I realized I had 21 pairs in all, wow! At least now I will always have something to wear this spring and summer, no matter what color I choose.

 

Doctor, Doctor, Can't You See I'm Burning, Burning...

So this week has found me plagued with an annoying fever that doesn't want to leave. It started on Sunday when I woke up feeling a bit hot. At this point it was only at about 101.7 F but I thought to rest since it might be the beginning of a flu. I had plans that day and that evening, but as the day went on I wasn't feeling much better so I cancelled them. The next day it continued going up and down, and got as high as 103. I called my medical plan and spoke to the advice nurse. She seemed perplexed as the fever (and occassional chills) were the only symptoms I was exhibiting. She told me to keep taking Tylenol to keep it down, that my body was probably fighting some type of virus or something. Well it continued the next morning so I made an appointment to see my doctor at Kaiser. He couldn't figure out what it could be but he ordered some bloodwork to be done, testing me for various things. He called me today with the results: all negative and normal. Sigh. He says that either one of two things will happen this weekend: other symptoms will pop up or it might just go away, having been a bug that's run it's course. I'm hoping it's the latter, because this crap is beginning to annoy me. So far today i've been feeling ok. My temperature has stayed between 98 - 99, though I still feel hot here and there and feel more comfortable wearing as little as possible. I'm just annoyed and frustrated that this crap has gone on for 5 days and they can't seem to figure out what's wrong with me or even give me an idea as to what it might be. People always say that men are stubborn and are afraid to go to the doctor. It's not that we're afraid, it's that we want solid answers and we want them immediately, none of this sitting around and waiting bullshit! I'm most likely going to cancel my plans for this weekend and just stay home and rest. If this shit persists i'm going back and not leaving until they fix me, goddamnit! Or I might just become the next victim of human spontaneous combustion and then my problem will be solved. Ugh!

 

New Ultraman Toy

My toy fever comes in sporadic waves. Sometimes i'll go months without buying anything, then I might buy a few at a time. It's been months since i'd purchased anything so I decided to head out to my local collectibles stores just to have a look.

 

 

The store, Time Tunnel Collectibles, is a pretty cool shop. It has all sorts of nostalgic goodies from way back. If you're into collecting vintage toys and collectibles chances are you'll find something to your liking here. They tend to carry Godzilla and Ultraman stuff, so that's my main reason for going there. Sometimes they don't have much, but I was in luck because they had these new Ultra Act series Bandai Ultraman figures. They're highly poseable, bending at every joint, and have interchangeable parts too. I picked up Ultraseven, who's always been one of my favorite Ultramen.

 

 

With the interchangeable parts it allows you to not only pose him, but show off his powers. One arm comes with the traditional spacium beam that all Ultramen posses. Here he is blasting the monster Velokron (yes, I can identify practically all the Ultraman monsters, told you I was a geek).

 

 

You can put on a hand that is throwing his eye slugger, probably his most powerful weapon. That spike that goes down the back of his head can be taken off and he shoots it at enemy monsters, slicing and dicing them to pieces. He's decapitated and dismembered quite a few monsters with this one.

 

 

Another cool weapon of his is called the Emerium Beam. He puts his fingers together over the green light on his forehead and it shoots out a green beam. I have his arms a bit too low in this pic but you get the idea.

 

 

I'm pretty happy with this dude. The inter-poseable feature is quite cool, and the fact that this was manufactured by Bandai is even cooler. They make a lot of Godzilla and Ultraman toys and have been since the early 80's. However, their standard Ultraman figures usually tend to be standing stiffly, only allowing you to move the arms. With these new Ultra-Act series figures you can even move the ends of the toes up and down. Now that's what I call articulation! Such highly detailed figures usually don't do much for me, but these ones really get it right. I can even have him ride Godzilla (no pun intended, haha!)

 

 

So yes i'm an Ultraman fan and have been since I first watched Ultraman episodes on tv in syndication in the early 80's. I even got him tattooed on my chest!

 

 

I'm hoping they release more Ultra figures in this series. I'd love to get my hands on an Ultraman Ace, Ultraman Leo and Ultraman Max. Ok, that's enough geekiness for now.  ;-)

An Observation On Sex And Friendship

A few weeks ago a Facebook friend updated his status, asking his friends to discuss sexual objectification in the gay community. It got me to thinking about how this has affected my life as a gay man. I don't have a lot of gay male friends, and the reason for this seems to be due to sex. It seems that if a guy is trying to get to know me then 9 times out of 10 it's only because he wants to sleep with me. And then, if a guy isn't interested in sleeping with me then he won't bother getting to know me. It's as though many times gay men only see each other as potential sex partners or boyfriends. Now I realize that men tend to be more sexual and i'm definitely not a prude when it comes to sex, but it would be nice to be able to have a friend whose penis hasn't been inside one of my orifices at one point in our friendship. Or to just be able to hang out with a dude knowing that he has no desire to get into my undies or for his main objective in going out with me one night isn't to end the night in my bed, naked and sweaty on top of me. Am I wrong for wanting to be seen as a cool, fun guy instead of just a vessel for you to stick your penis into? And I know that i'm a cool, fun guy because I have plenty of female and straight guy friends who seem to enjoy my company without us ever having gotten sexual. Why is it that most gay men have such a hard time with platonic friendships?

 

I admit that i've been guilty of it myself. But I think in my case i've adopted a "if you can't beat 'em, join em" mentality. I've gotten together with guys who I knew only wanted to sleep with me, figuring that I might as well get something out of it. Though it would be nice if guys could be more direct about it. If you want to sleep with me just say so. Don't give me this crap about wanting to go have a few drinks or "let's watch some dvd's at my place" when you really just want to get me out of my clothes and plow me. I've had guys who were upfront about wanting to have sex with me, and due to their honesty most of those guys got what they wanted. Told you I wasn't a prude! But I digress.....

 

Maybe I need to just change my way of thinking and accept that a sexual connection is still a valid connection. But there's still a small part of me that feels that perhaps we're missing out on opportunities to really get to know someone by choosing to think with our little heads instead of our big heads. I think about the platonic friendships I have and how rewarding and fullfilling they've been, and how they've lasted for years and many will probably last until the day I die. Then I think about the guys i've slept with and how most of those connections never really lasted or progressed any further than meeting up every so often for a mutual blowjob. Friendship and sex have never seemed to go hand in hand for me, so perhaps I need to accept that and keep them seperate. A friend is a friend, a trick is a trick, and like oil and water they shouldn't mix. So with that said, I have plans this upcoming weekend to do fun stuff with friends. Platonic friends. So with my friendship calendar full, who wants a no strings attached blowjob? Hahaha!